Are we the only ones who make up letters?

Bad job, messy workers, great skill with their hands (can bound and gag someone in less that a minute), very overpriced.

Adrian, Fracture Ward, Auckland.

My disabled wife still can’t get out because of their large excavation in my back section. I know that the nice very large man, who doesn’t speak any English, needed to dig such a large hole because I was told so. My neighbour doesn’t mind that his house is now sinking a little as he also has been threatened by the owners of this company. As agreed I fully endorse these people and in doing so look forward to the safe return of my wife’s wheelchair.

James, Whangarei.

Before the job started they very kindly escorted me to the bank so that I could pay their invoice in cash and they also gladly accepted a fair bit more than the original quote. I am an elderly widow in my eighties and know that it wasn’t their fault that my job was left undone because one of the two owners was taken away for a long while to help the police with their enquiries. Not everyone is willing to forgo their work to be so public spirited!

Edith, Gisbourne.

They arrived 6 months late, ate and drank me out of house and home and left such a mess behind that it took me 3 months to clear up. This is not as bad as it seems as they knew I had lots of time on my hands and was easily persuaded that, with the clever use of thumb screws, a bit of hard work was good for me. I would always recommend these people as they know where I live and they have told me what happened to the last customer that complained.

Alfred, North Shore.

NICE WEE LETTER FROM CUSTOMER CALLED COLIN IN AUCKLAND to be inserted